Funeral Preparation and Planning

This page contains resources for making funeral arrangements for a loved one. You may also pre-plan funerals for those that their wishes are known.
 
If you have had a death in your family and need to make arrangements, please call the church Mon-Fri at 919.479.1001. Off hours, please call the priest's residence at 919.797.0947   Please contact a local funeral home at your earliest convenience.

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“In the face of death, the Church confidently proclaims that God has created each person for eternal life and that Jesus, the Son of God, by his death and resurrection, has broken the chains of sin and death that bound humanity.” Vatican Council II.

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The principal liturgies in the Order of Christian Funerals are:  (1) Vigil for the Deceased, (2) the Funeral Mass or Funeral Liturgy Outside Mass, and (3) the Rite of Committal.
 
1)        Vigil –A priest, deacon, or a qualified lay minister may preside at the Vigil service. This is an appropriate time for family and friends to share memories of the deceased.
2)         Funeral Mass or Funeral Liturgy Outside Mass –The Church will supply a presider (priest/deacon), cantor, organist and a funeral program.  Here are some things you may want to consider:

o    Scripture Readings – You may choose three readings (plus a Psalm which is part of the music selection). Follow this link to the USCCB website for selecting readings. [Funeral Readings]
o    Music – The Church will provide a cantor, an organist, and guidance for [musical selections].
                Psalm 23 - The Lord is my Shepherd
                Psalm 27 The Lord is my Light
                Psalm 103 The Lord is Kind
                Psalm 116 I will walk before the Lord
o    Reflection – A family member or friend may offer a brief reflection during the funeral service (3-4 minutes). (The preferred time for family and friends to share memories of the deceased is at the Vigil.)
o    Program – The Funeral Home generally provide a program.  If it does not, please contact the office for assistance.
o    Family involvement - Some opportunities for friends/family to be involved in the liturgy are: readers (1-2 people), a reflection (1 person), pallbearers (2-6 people), extraordinary ministers of Holy Communion, and the presentation of the gifts (2 people). The church can supply people for these roles if requested.
o    Reception – We have a Funeral Hospitality Ministry. Food and light refreshments are provided.  It is a nice opportunity for you to greet friends without the stress of hosting at your home. There is no charge for this service. If you would like to request a reception, please let us know about how many people will attend.

3)   Rite of Committal – This is a short rite, about 15 minutes long. The presider may be a priest, deacon, or a qualified lay minister. The Rite takes place at the graveside.
 
Donations: 
There is no charge for a Funeral Mass at St. Matthew. Families often ask if they can make a contribution. Since the organist and cantor are paid $100 each, most families work with the funeral home to arrange payment directly to those individuals. Families generally make additional gifts to others involved in the funeral (priest, deacon, lector, etc.) in the range of $100-$150 each. Should you desire to do so, checks should be made out to the individual. For any gift to the church, the check can be made out to "St. Matthew Church." Again, note there is No Charge to celebrate a funeral liturgy at St. Matthew. 
 
If you have any questions, please contact the Pastor in the Parish Office at 919-479-1001.